How do I forgive when I HURT so much?

Published on Dec 11th, 2009 by Charlie | 0

randyRandy is the Dr. of Opthomology on our missions team. What a wonderful experience it must be to give sight to those in desperate need. I had the opportunity to hand out reading glasses while on  mission  in Puerto Colombia one year. I will never forget the line of people weighting to be sized with the right strength and the expression on their face when the words on their bibles became clear is unforgetable.

Since Randy is working with an overwhelming amount of patients, he has little time for evangelism. Usually on Friday (our free day) the medical team heads out to share the Gospel. Here is one story that Randy brought back from the mission field that hit me pretty  hard. This story gives you an idea of the kind of the bondage that we see while in the mission field. I don’t believe I would have been equipped for this kind of meeting, but our Lord sent Randy to loose the bindings on this man.

Barranquilla, Columbia e3 Partners campaign October 30, 2009

An evangelism outreach was staged in a neighborhood where our host Bernardo Gonzalez had a vision to plant a new church. About seventeen campaigners joined seventeen Columbian translators and piled in a bus to travel to the neighborhood. Nearly forty volunteers from Bernardo’s church met us at the site.

I paired up with Jean Young, a nurse on my team, with two translators – Dio and Sylvana – and Iris, a Spanish only speaking church volunteer. After a group prayer and pictures, Iris led us down a street and we turned left down another street and she went through the gate outside a home and knocked on the open door. We were invited in by a young man in his early twenties with a four year old girl and he seated us on a sofa and love seat. The girl was excused to another room.

There were about fifty plastic chairs stacked in the living room which seemed strange. I shared my testimony with Sylvana translating. The theme is relationships and how I struggled to love and forgive those closest to me until I trusted Christ for salvation. With His Presence and guidance I have been successful to forgive in my relationship with my father and to commit my love to my wife for twenty-three years now.

The young man said the story spoke to his heart because he was struggling with a forgiveness issue and he was separated from his wife. I asked him if we could share the cube telling the story of God and Jesus and he consented. The image depicting God is a white light and we were asked if everyone has seen that light. I said, “No, not everyone. A few have seen the light but most people see the light by faith”. We read to him from Acts the story of Paul seeing the light on the road to Damascus.

He said that he once crashed on a motorcycle and felt he was floating and saw the white light and then was back in his bruised body. Our main emphasis with the white light is to depict a holy God, our Creator. We continued to use the cube to share God’s plan for salvation through His Son. I asked, “Wouldn’t you like to receive Jesus and the gift of God’s forgiveness for your sins?” He said no because he would feel like a hypocrite. He said his heart was filled with hatred and revenge for the people in the neighboring country where his brother had been murdered six days prior. (The plastic chairs were for the funeral gathering). He wanted to just kill as many of them as he could.

At this point Dio asked if he could share something and I said yes. Dio shared his story that ten years earlier his father had been murdered and Dio swore to avenge his father by killing the man who had done it. Before fulfilling that vow, God intervened and saved him and changed his heart. His mother’s health suffered a stroke after that tragedy and Dio was glad to still be around to help his Mom. He told the young man that if he goes after those people in revenge, the end result will be that he will die.

Dio was challenged, “My brother had killed no one and yet he was murdered”. Dio responded that Jesus was the most innocent person who ever lived and yet He suffered a most horrific death. He took the conversation right back to the cross. Jean read to him the scripture in Romans that says, “Vengence is mine, saith the Lord”. We challenged him to let God deal with those murderers and avenge his brother. The four year old girl was his niece so we encouraged him that his Mom and eleven year old brother and his little niece (who just lost her dad) all needed him to be there for them. We invited him to make a decision and he answered no.

Iris began to speak to him in Espanol without translation. Then I asked him since his heart was filled with hatred if he thought God still loves him. He said yes. “What if Iris was a prostitute and slept with men for money, do you think God would still love her?” He said yes. I said that you are a man, a strong man, and it is very normal for a man to want to avenge his brother. I would probably do the same if I were in your place. You cannot change your own heart, but God loves you right now, right where you are. You don’t have to clean yourself up and then come to Him.

Come to Him just as you are and trust Him and He will change what He wants to change in your heart with His power. Maybe His plan is for you to go into the army and your country will send you to war against that country to kill them. Maybe God will have a plan for some other work for you to do. He loves you perfectly right now and He is the One with the power to change your heart if you will trust Him. Wouldn’t you like to receive Jesus and the gift of God’s forgiveness of your sins? Answer: Yes, I would.

So I asked Dio to lead him in a prayer for salvation and we prayed, then I asked someone to pray for his grief because he was still hurting from the loss of his brother and Sylvana prayed for him. The young man’s countenence was now changed, no longer somber and fighting back the anger and hatred. He was now calm and peaceful with a smile on his face.

Jean suggested we give him the Spanish/English New Testament. Sylvana wrote, “the date of your new birth” on the inside cover and we all signed and presented it to him. Iris took his name and address information for follow up with the planting church.

He brought out his Mom and asked us to pray for her. Several adults came into the room and I pulled out some reading glasses and asked if anyone needed them. I fit four of them with reading glasses including his Mom. Then she sat down and Jean prayed for her in her grief in losing her son with translation into Espanol.

Dio asked if he could follow up with the young man and they exchanged e-mail addresses to stay in touch and to send him a new believer follow up study. We then returned to our departure site and waited for others on the outreach to return and rejoiced with them for what God had done. Many others had made professions of faith that day. Thank you Lord!

Submitted by Randall Baughman, O.D. Southside Fellowship Church Greenville, SC

Leave a New Comment